I took a 3 week online course, Ordinary Magic by Kelle Hampton in May 2020. It was a simple, little course that reminded me of big, important things. I want to share my assignments on here so I can refer to them in the future, and to keep me accountable to my dreams.
The course had 12 explorations, 5 podcasts with Kelle Hampton, 3 sessions of live office hours, and 4 zoom meetings. We also had 3 bonus pod casts with the authors: Kate Baer, Nora McInerny, and Ingrid Fetell Lee.
Welcome to Ordinary Magic
Our prep-work was to make a binder cover where we we would keep all of our course materials and work. It had been a long time since I had done anything creative, and it felt so nice to just doodle and color.
We also had to introduce ourselves to the group of 5 hosts/moderators and 354 members!
Hi there! I'm Jennifer, an American married to a Canadian living in Ottawa, Ontario. We have 7 kiddos, ages 2 to 18. We love to travel and have been lucky enough to live in England, Taiwan, and India. I don't want to move again for a while, but someday hope to live in France. I'm so happy to have this time to make magic with all of you!
Section 1: The Sweep
Exploration #1
What are your stumbling blocks?
This was hard! I have so many stumbling blocks on my path, that it's hard to see the path! I think a big one is I've had a hard time blooming where I'm planted. I grew up in a place that's sunny year-round, and now I live in a place that's cold/snowy/icy/gloomy for 6 months of the year. We're also very far from our extended families and I don't get time with my friends as I have in the past, so I feel lonely quite a lot. I also have a very negative inner voice, but I don't want to give her a name, I just want to banish her from existence. I have so many things I want to do that I get overwhelmed and can't focus on what to spend my time on. I also lack belief in myself that I can accomplish my goals. And yet, I still dream.
Exploration #2
Your Inner Critic
Part 1: Name your inner critic
I named my inner critic, Cruella. I never want to hurt anyone, so I couldn't give her a real name. She is vicious and tears me to shreds every chance she gets. Yes, I see the irony how I don't want to hurt anyone else, but abuse myself constantly. My husband is a successful, happy-go-lucky soul and he gets down, because I listen to the awful things Cruella tells me instead of what he tells me. Cruella makes me feel like a spoiled brat, always wanting more and ungrateful for what I have. Why do I listen to her?
Part 2: Write an Action Plan to silence your inner critic
Part 3: Your Truth- Write your affirmation
My affirmation is my mantra shared yesterday on my action plan, but these are the words I need to hear often.
Section 2: Unearthing Your Dreams
Exploration #3
Who Am I?
Write your bio
Jennifer Reil loves to create home and celebrate all the holidays with her handsome hubby of 23 years and seven sweet kiddos. Bright colors bring her joy and she enjoys painting and decorating cupcakes. Her love of travel has taken her to 16 countries. Although the ocean is her favorite, she loves to be anywhere that the birds are chirping and the flowers are blooming.
Exploration #4
The Law of Conservation
Part 1: What do you give vs. What you want more of
I suffer from chronic sleep maintenance insomnia, so I feel like I am tired all the time. However, the biggest negative thing that takes up my time and and energy are the thoughts of all the things I should be doing, the thoughts of the things I want to be doing, just thinking and not doing, ugh! Plus, I waste a lot of time with screens. The main things I want more space for are quality time with my loved ones, more travel (after covid-19 dies, will it ever?), and more time developing hobbies and talents. I just remembered a line of dolls I created 15 years ago, when my then 3 year-old daughter was in the hospital with encephalitis. Life can get in the way of our dreams, but our dreams change too.
Part 2: For a week say yes to something you want to do by saying no to something else.
Saying No is hard for me too. Almost a year and a half ago, I said no to a friend. I really couldn't do it at that time and everything turned out fine for her, but I still feel guilty about it after all this time has passed. Today I said no to all of my family's laundry to say yes to the past 3 assignments for Ordinary Magic. I know I'll be doing laundry tomorrow, but it reminded me I need to teach my younger children to help more.
Exploration #5
The Law of Attraction
Write your dream narrative
The morning sunlight dances across my pillow as the curtains billow in the soft breeze. I kiss Leonard on the cheek, then roll out of bed. I put on my long, white sundress and long-sleeved, sky blue blouse leaving the buttons open. I grab my comfy sandals and wide-brimmed sunhat and head to the kitchen.
I start peeling oranges, while Leonard scrambles some eggs. After our simple breakfast, we stroll through the orchard on our way down to town. We take this path every day, but the views of the Mediterranean Sea still take my breath away.
We like to arrive at the farmer's market right as it opens, so we can have first pick of all the gorgeous fruits and veggies. Today we choose tomatoes in the same shade of red as my favorite lipstick, Picholine olives, eggplant, zucchini, peaches, and cherries. I also pick up a bouquet of sunflowers, hyacinth, and lavender.
We carry our basket of goodies between us, as we begin to climb the hill back to our home. The sea breeze carries the scent of Etruscan honeysuckle, and I breathe it in with my whole soul.
The song of the lark gets swallowed up as we open our back door. The kids are scampering down the stairs. They're awake now and ready for their breakfast.
Exploration #6
Energy in Motion
What is the first step to accomplish your dream?
I would love to live in France some day. My husband is fluent in French (and Mandarin), and all of our school children have studied French (although my oldest son is the only one who can speak it comfortably). I have lived in Canada for almost 13 of the last 18 years and I can't speak one word (well I guess I can say one word, bonjour!). Today I got Rosetta Stone, so I can start learning French :).
Section 3: Chart Your Own Course
Exploration #7
Joy-lift your Space
I've kind of cheated with this assignment. We just moved into our home on October 1st. Our builder had to fix several things in our home and they seriously just finished in February. I had unpacked little by little, but we still had more to unpack and everything to organize, and all of the things that make a house our home to put up on the walls. For the first 4 weeks of quarantine, (with the occasional help from my family) I got the entire inside of our home completely unpacked and organized. That felt so good! (Yes, the garage is glaring at me still and I will get to it when the weather is just right, not too icky and not too lovely.) I've slowly been decorating and it truly has been a "Joy-lift"! This is a photo of our gallery wall in the family room. It may look cheesy, but seeing photos of my children through the years, brings me joy! (Don't mind the green toy beneath the curtain that desperately needs to be steamed, ha ha!)
*As I type this up, the garage has been organized!
I'm totally going to overshare with this assignment, please forgive me. I LOVE visiting my friends and family members' homes (and I even love when I'm out on a walk in the evening and the lights are on in someone's home and I can take a little peak inside to see their sanctuary). These are some shelves I put up in the powder bathroom of my babies in the bubble bath. Every time I walk by and see it out of the corner of my eye, I can't help but smile.
I haven't been able to print the photo of my youngest little one yet, but I had to share it because she lights me up!
Hooray! Macy's photo is on the wall!
(Still hoping I can put another baby in the bubble bath photo in that last frame!)
We opted to remove the front door closet (as we have a mudroom at the back door). I've made this my "holiday" space. I switch out the decor each month for whatever holiday/season it is. For May I have flowers as the theme for what April showers bring us and for Mother's Day.
Last photo, I promise! The gorgeous beach pictures I had printed and framed for my older boys' room got destroyed in a move. I got some cheap calendars to replace the prints we lost, and cheap frames from the dollar store a while ago. I finally cut out all the prints and put them in the frames. Tomorrow my honey will help me hang them. Hooray for joy-lifting spaces!
These are the photos for the other side of the boys' room too.
*Now all 16 of these photos are hanging in their room!
Exploration #8
Input and Output
Part 1: What input do you want from others?
I have realized again, that I want to please people. It's hard to please everyone though. I don't share on social media on Mother's Day about my mom, because I don't want to hurt my step-mom. I don't share about my step-mom either, because I don't want to hurt my mom. So I end up sharing about my kids and ignore the fact that I have 2 moms that I love (and the same thing for Father's Day, since I have a dad and step-dad). I also want approval from people I admire. Since I admire them, I want them to admire me (this applies to family members, friends, and even strangers). It's like I'm in school and want the popular kids to notice me. I remember when I was a kid telling my mom that her opinion of me didn't matter- because she was my mom she was biased and of course she loved me. I now find myself telling that to my husband- he thinks I'm amazing, but I don't believe him. Hello!?! My husband and my mom are the 2 most important people in my life (adult people, of course my kiddos are the most important too, and my dad!). Their opinions should be the ones I value the most!
Part 2: Write a mission statement for the output you want to share with the world.
"It's a dandy day!"
This may sound corny, but I have a friend that says this almost every time I see him. Even though I've heard it countless times, it always makes me smile and feel grateful.
The message I want to share with the world is that I love life (this is hard when you battle depression and anxiety). I want other people to feel better after interacting with me. I want to love people and make them feel good about themselves. I want to travel this big wide world and rejoice in its beauty. I want to care more about people than things. I want to be busy and an active participant in life. I want to enjoy the every day chores and make time for creativity.
I want to uplift others and realize in my own life, that it IS a dandy day!
Exploration #9
Being Yourself vs. Being Nice
Shift something you do to be "nice" to something to be "yourself"
One thing I don't do very often that I used to do a lot is CREATE. And it is myself- my expectations that are holding me back. I feel I can't work on my art unless the house is perfectly spotless, I've spent 10 hours of quality time with each of my kiddos and my hubby, and the rest of the things on my never-ending to do list are checked off. The thing is- my house isn't spotless, I'm not spending 10 hours of quality time with each family member, my to do list is still never ending, AND I'm not creating. I think if I create more, I'll be happier, then my house will be tidied up more often, and I'll have more quality time with my family, and check some more things off my to do list. I think being myself, an artist, is who I am internally, but being nice is being all the things expected from me externally. I need to find better balance.
Section 4: Lifelong Ordinary Magic
Exploration #10
The Power of Ritual
What will your new ritual be?
I am an early riser and am up for at least an hour before any of my family. For the past 6 weeks I've had a routine of exercising, praying, reading my scriptures, writing in my journal, and checking my emails. I then wake up my family for our family routine- we pray, recite our motto, read, sing, and share hugs. I love this time together and it's a great way to start the day.
I don't sleep well, so when evening time rolls around I turn into a pumpkin. I want to create an evening routine though that makes a special way to end the day. BQ (before quarantine), my husband and I would take one of our children out on a one-on-date each month. We have 7 kiddos, so as our family has grown each child would only get one or two of these dates a year, but they were something we all enjoyed. Now that our go-karting, mani/pedi, trampoline park venues have closed we've stopped having these dates. I miss the one-on-one time, so to combine that individual time with an evening routine this is what I'm going to start doing. Every evening I'll light a candle in my room, and invite one child (or two, maybe have roommates come in) for a special story time with mom and dad before they get tucked into bed. My kiddos are growing fast and I don't want to look back with regrets because I was too tired.
Exploration #11
Giving Intentionally
Make a list of meaningful things you can do for someone else.
My short term ideas:
Send cards to Aunt Gretchen and Brenna
Make treats/or get flowers and deliver to 5 new neighbors on the street
Bake cupcakes each Sunday and surprise a different friend with them
Long term ideas:
Make Christmas Carol books for whole family to sing with
Create photo books of favorite recipes to share with extended family as Christmas gifts- new idea, ask for their favorite recipes to include
Choose family to serve and start planning 12 days of Christmas box now
Remember: Do good, feel good, do more good!
Exploration #12
Committing to Ordinary Magic
What is the one thing you were surprised by during this experience?
So many other women struggle with their own Cruellas telling them they're not enough, but the Cruellas are WRONG! We ARE enough and we can make life magical for ourselves and our loved ones.
What is one new thing you learned about yourself?
My dreams matter. The good I can create in the world matters. I need to get to work and do it. Leave the guilt behind and catch the joy!
List the practices and rituals you will return to again and again for joy, comfort, reflection, and connection.
1. I am loved; I am good; I can improve; I can do good works; I can make my dreams come true.
2. Continue personal morning routine. Continue family morning routine.
3. Start family evening routine. Be accountable to do at least one nice thing each week for someone outside my family.
4. It's a dandy day! Do something every day that brings me joy. Arts and crafts are good for me, then I can be better for others.
5. Keep dreaming! Always be planning the next birthday, holiday, seasonal outing, or vacation. Don't give up on wanting one more baby. Don't give up on wanting to live in France someday, and to visit the rest of the continents.
I really hope I can implement what I have learned and create Ordinary Magic for myself and my family each day!
